{"id":351,"date":"2011-12-22T15:13:53","date_gmt":"2011-12-22T15:13:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/stashreport.com\/?p=351"},"modified":"2011-12-22T15:13:53","modified_gmt":"2011-12-22T15:13:53","slug":"x-mas-day-22","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/?p=351","title":{"rendered":"X-Mas Day 22"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"fcbkbttn_buttons_block\" id=\"fcbkbttn_left\"><div class=\"fcbkbttn_button\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/facebook-button-plugin\/images\/standard-facebook-ico.png\" alt=\"Fb-Button\" \/>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div><div class=\"fcbkbttn_like \"><fb:like href=\"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/?p=351\" action=\"like\" colorscheme=\"light\" layout=\"standard\"  width=\"225px\" size=\"small\"><\/fb:like><\/div><\/div><p><em><strong>Yesterday a good friend of mine,<\/strong> let&#8217;s call her M.S., was over our house. Out of the blue, she says, &#8220;What terrible thing ever happened to you as a child? All of your poems about Christmas are so dark and macabre. They&#8217;re so sad and disturbing&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>In order to make her feel better, by showing that there still remains a bright ember of goodness and faith in humanity, I&#8217;m composing the following, in real time. It comes right from the heart.<br \/>\n<\/em><br \/>\n<strong>Holiday Happiness<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Every night I go to sleep well fed&#8230;<br \/>\nWoke up this morning, guess I&#8217;m not  dead.<\/p>\n<p><strong>End<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>Now&#8230; getting back to business&#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n<p> <strong>Santa\u2019s Moving<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Santa\u2019s moving from the cold North Pole<br \/>\nAnd heading down south to sunny Mexico.<br \/>\nIt seems that Mrs. Claus has achy knees<br \/>\nAnd yearns for a warm and tropical breeze.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s not just going where the sun is warm<br \/>\nOr getting away from the cold snow storms&#8230;<br \/>\nRudolph\u2019s bright nose doesn\u2019t shine so red<br \/>\nAnd inflation\u2019s caused a great overhead.<\/p>\n<p>The elves have joined the Leprechaun Union&#8230;<br \/>\nAnd Santa\u2019s heard that they\u2019re gonna sue him.<br \/>\nIt\u2019s a time saving, cost cutting, clever solution<br \/>\nTo move to where people don\u2019t mind pollution.<\/p>\n<p>Children workers are as good as elves&#8230;<br \/>\nSmall and helpless, they can\u2019t defend themselves.<br \/>\nThey\u2019ll work long hours, weekends and holidays too<br \/>\nAnd then get paid pennies, when they are through.<\/p>\n<p>If Miguel gets injured and Jose gets sick,<br \/>\nSanta will make sure to sack them, quick&#8230;<br \/>\n\u2018Cause there\u2019s no insurance at the Santa Works,<br \/>\nWhere employees are offered no medical perks.<\/p>\n<p>Santa will get rid of his worries and tensions&#8230;<br \/>\n\u2018Cause Mexicans don\u2019t ask for retirement pensions.<br \/>\n(Those worried about their financial order,<br \/>\n Have already slipped through our porous border.)<\/p>\n<p>Santa\u2019s plan is to \u201cgo poof\u201d&#8230; just vanish.<br \/>\nThat\u2019s why the Clauses are both learning Spanish.<br \/>\nG\u2019bye antlers and swishy tails&#8230;<br \/>\nOh yeah&#8230;<br \/>\nDon\u2019t miss next month\u2019s venison sale.<\/p>\n<p>Bye-bye&#8230; bon appetite!<\/p>\n<p><strong>End<\/strong>   <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Yesterday a good friend of mine, let&#8217;s call her M.S., was over our house. Out of the blue, she says, &#8220;What terrible thing ever happened to you as a child? All of your poems about Christmas are so dark and &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/?p=351\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-351","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/351","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=351"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/351\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":354,"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/351\/revisions\/354"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=351"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=351"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stashreport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=351"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}